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英语搞笑剧本-唐伯虎点秋香

发布时间:2016-07-07 08:40 作者:我爱小宋网 阅读次数:

Flirting Scholar
(唐伯虎点秋香)
Cast
唐伯虎··········
祝枝山··········
文征明··········
周文斌··········
秋 香··········
石 榴··········
夏 香··········
春 香··········
冬 香··········
如 花··········
惨 人··········
华夫人··········
夺命书生··········
仆人甲··········
仆人水··········
假死人··········
华 文··········
一女子··········
围观者(数名)··········
丑婢女(数名)··········
假新娘(数名)··········
仆人(数名)··········
结束舞(全体)··········

Act 1
地点:The backyard of Tang’s house
人物:唐伯虎,祝枝山,仆人甲,仆人水
道具:文房四宝,鸡翅,2穿翅杈, 3桌子,1凳子,背景音乐
旁白:唐伯虎,于明宪宗成化六年庚寅年寅月寅日寅时出世,故名唐寅,又因属虎,故又名唐伯虎。唐寅聪明绝顶,诗画双杰,位居江南四大才子之首,为当时男女老少所崇拜的偶像。

(唐伯虎手执毛笔,用酱油刷鸡翅膀)
仆人甲: Master, isn't one dish of soy enough?
唐伯虎: Slowly, please.
仆人甲: Many people come for your paintings, why don't you bother?
唐: I have no mood to draw. Give them two more baskets of rubbish, that's it.
仆人甲:Yes.
(出门时在门中碰见祝枝山)
Mr. Zhu.
祝枝山:Ah, Brother Tong.
唐伯虎:Hey, Brother Zhu.
祝:Help, Brother Tong.
唐:l think you must have lost all you money again.
祝:You understand me so well.
唐:Among the 'Four Scholars', everyone knows you love gambling.
Having no money, to live comfortably', it is your motto, right?
祝:You are flattering me! You're born to be a free-liver. In fact, you are much more luckier than me.
唐: But... you lose so much money per every two days, and you come to seek help from me after losing money, l don't think l can help you forever.
祝: Sure! Because of that, l tried to risk for the last time.
But l lost the money which l could earn till my death.
That's 300,000 taels.
So, l have to beg you to draw 30 paintings...in order to save my life.
唐: l see, I see.
Shui, go out first.
仆人水: Yes, master.
唐: Damn you, don't you think l owe you that? You need 30 paintings?
No way!
祝: Please! lt's my fault,l am now begging you to forgive me.
Also, l always help you to sell your paintings which make you get rich!
Some loan-sharks are waiting for me outside,
They want me to get 30 paintings of yours within one hour.
Otherwise, they'll kill me!
Will you help me or not?
唐: One hour? Well, since you are my brother,
l will write your lament for your funeral.
Say, 'A bastard' or 'A scumbag', which one do you like?
Choose between these two.
祝: Pak Fu, don't be that mean to me.
l swear if l gamble again, let me marry with the worst woman, ls it OK?
唐: You made such worst oath!
OK, l will save you for the last time.
Man, give me the stationery.
祝: You are such a heroic friend, so righteous!
(唐伯虎作画)
祝: Wow! It is pretty good!


Act 2
地点:A river side, on the street
人物:江南四大才子,如花,一女子,围观者,四香,石榴,华夫人,丑婢女
道具:4扇子,丝巾,伞,小刀,2凳子,背景音乐
旁白:第二幕,江南四大才子结伴出游,众女子兴奋观看。

一女子:Look, the 'Four Scholars' are over there.
(四大才子摆pose,众女子倾倒)

一女子:Go and have a look,

祝枝山:We come here for a tour.
That’s why the girls are that crazy.

文征明:Pals, why not has a poem competition?

祝:Very good idea!
Why don't you start first? Brother Wen bin.

周文斌:l am the best in this field.
'There are many geese under the mountain.'

文征明:'They rushed down to the river.'

祝:'Let's roast a goose.'

唐:'After roasting, you'd better go home for a screw.'

三人:Good, very good. Very good!
(三人笑,唐伯虎逛笑)

祝:There is something attractive.
See, there is a beauty on the bridge. She seems to be lonely.
Why not show us your talent about how to court a girl.
To let us learn from you!

唐:Well...

周文斌:lt's the welfare for your friends, so?

唐:l am glad to demonstrate it.
三人:Go.

唐:Miss.

如花:What's the matter? (一回头,竟是如花!)

三人:Go, go...

唐:May l put my head on your shoulder?

如花:ls it OK? No, l am a girl, a decent girl.

唐:l know, l want to make my friends happy, that's all.
ln fact, l am Tong Pak-Fu.

如花:So what?l don't know you.
l will shout for help if you don't leave me alone.

唐:How about paying you 1 tael?

如花:1 tael? Who do you think l a.m.?
Make it ten.

唐:That's too expensive, why don't you rob?

如花:Right, l am robber.
Give me all your money.
(两人乱打,最后如花被唐伯虎打落河中)

三人:What's wrong? (赶到桥上)What’s the matter?

文征明:No need to punch her like that?

唐:Robber! lt's a ladyboy!

三人:Ladyboy?

祝:l love it. Hold it. (祝枝山将折扇递给文斌,跳入河中)

文征明:Damn it. He is being the first to!

(华夫人带众人去拜神)
春香:Look, so many people!

夏香:Yes, it's crowded.

华夫人:Chun-xiang, Xia-xiang, shut up,

四大才子:Heave yourselves.
What's going on?

某人:Madam Hua and her 4 pretty maids have come for worshipping.

周文斌:The maids are all pretty, especially Qiu-xiang.

唐:Who is she? Who is Qiu-xiang?

文斌,征明:Look! That way.

三人:Qiu-xiang.
(秋香回首一笑)

唐:Damn, she is not pretty at all.

周文斌:You know, pretty woman is like flowers.
You'll be all eyes for its beauty if some leaves are around.
Look once more.

三人:Pretty woman!
(一整排回首,旁人皆成丑女衬托)

唐:Woo, she is really pretty!
Let's go in the temple together.
To look for fun!
Act 3
地点:West Gate of Hua’s house
人物:唐伯虎,秋香,石榴,惨人,假死人
道具:“旺财”,1手帕,“小强”,2卖身牌,1棍子,4凳子,银两
旁白:第三幕,华府西门口。唐伯虎为追秋香,化装成贫民意图混进华府。

唐:You can't move no matter what happens! OK?

假死人:Take it easy! Leave It to Me
(假死人躺在车上装死)

唐:Cheap man! A brand new cheap man for sale.
Come and have a look! I’m so poor!
(石榴和秋香出门)

石榴:Are you selling yourself to bury your dad?
But it's not lucky to see a dead body early in the morning.

唐:l don't want, too.
Why don't you be merciful ['mə:siful]仁慈的;慈悲的;宽容的
buy me please.

石榴:What a pity (怜悯同情遗憾)? We need a workman indeed, why not...
(这时又来了一个人,推着木车,车上躺着六个死人,这人还口吐血,极其悲惨)

惨人:l am poor, l want to sell myself to bury my whol

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